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Friday, November 07, 2008

Killing Energy Vampires - When to give-up friendship


This is my thoughts on giving-up meaningless friendships.

"Lose a Friend, but don't lose the lesson."
_______________________________
Friends just come and go. Most friendship ends because of time and personal circumstances. However, once in a while you have to deliberately put an end to it.

When a friend is repeatedly questioning your integrity out of some baseless and childish reason, when a friend is asking you to give more responsibility outside the premise of your friendship, when a friend becomes an energy vampire, when you are so annoyed by the constant complaining of your friend about anything under the sun and didn’t accept any reasons from you or any of his or her other friends– then that is the time to put an end to it.

Sometimes, some of your friends will accuse you of dishonesty and will question your integrity. Even if, during the entire friendship, you already confided to them your darkest secret, just listen to them when they need it most and really care for them. During misunderstanding, out of some nonsense, they will show you that they are very hurt and do and say some terrible things about you, when in fact you are the one who’s really hurt by your friend’s lack of consideration and logic.

We must avoid selfish friends who are only concerned about their feelings.

We should also avoid false modesty - like inviting a friend even if we don't like his or her company, for the sake of modesty. That is being untruthful - "oroccan plastic" as they say.

When your friend turned to be an energy vampire, you should immediately decide whether the friendship is worth keeping. Energy vampires are those people whom always will suck-up positive energy of the group by their constant complaining, excessive negativity and pessimism. I realized that people always tend to avoid energy vampires.

I also learned that we should not share the burden of keeping the secret of our friend's friend. “You should also know this because I’m your friend,” is very common to every friendship on the premise that your friend must know the secret of your other friends.

But knowledge should enlighten us, not to give us additional burden. If it is about their private life, doesn’t concern me and will not harm my family, or me, I think it’s better that I should not know.

Friends are everywhere. Sometimes we lose some, and we find more.

If you can’t avoid energy vampires, kill them, just don't lose the lesson.





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About the Blogger

Yodi Insigne
Yodi de Veas Insigne is one of those delusional sorts who imagines himself a useful contributor to the greater blogosphere (Well, that's what he's trying to accomplish).

He started blogging for three reasons:

1. He always felt he has something important to say,
2. Books can make him cry, and cliff jumping can make him high,
3. He want to sleep at night.

He is a self-certified bookworm, travel junkie, shutterbug, movie freak, Mangyan hiker who sleeps a lot and think a lot. He got a little vice, which is black coffee and cashew nuts. He got colorblindness on yellow and green - and he freaking loves it!

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